Hi everyone, I'm Mindy Kaling.

Hi everyone.

Um, I'm Emma Thompson. [laughing]

And you know what we're about to do,

the WIRED Auto Complete Interview.

Yeah, seamlessly. [sunny music]

Something we didn't know anything about

until five minutes ago. Never heard of any--

And now it's our favorite. It sounds weird to me.

It sounds like somethings gonna just come at you

with electrodes.

Anyway. And it might be that way.

Let's start.

What do you think the first one's gonna say?

Is Mindy Kaling a human being?

Is Mindy Kaling-- As rich as I think she is?

[laughing] [peeling away paper]

Is Mindy Kaling real? I was right!

I win! You do win.

I so win. They think I'm AI.

Okay. Ah yeah.

Is Mindy Kaling married? Married.

Oh. Are you?

No I am not married. No, she's not.

But she is wearing a very nice ring on her wedding finger.

Who put these questions together?

Obviously it's the same question.

[laughing]

It's a murderer who's narrowing down all the information

about me to find out my address.

Yeah. [pulling off paper]

Is Mindy Kaling related to Priyanka Chopra?

No one's actually thought that, have they?

I Googled this, just so it would accumulate Google it

so that it would show up in this very circumstance.

Okay, here we go. [clearing throat]

Is Emma Thompson [peeling off paper]

a dame? A dame.

Yes, moving on.

Is Emma Thompson nice?

Eh.

Is Emma Thompson in Star Wars?

No! No!

Does everyone think you're in Star Wars?

Why do they think I'm in Star Wars?

You know why?

And this is true.

My agent actually said to the last people

who were making the last Star Wars,

I get very confused because obviously there's so many

spinoffy things. Yes.

And they said, Well you know,

he said, She'd be really interested in being in Star Wars

because I actually really like Star Wars

and they said no, so. They didn't--

I'm not in Star Wars because they don't want me

to be in Star Wars. [angrily tearing off paper]

Is Emma Thompson related to Vanessa Redgrave?

No. [throwing sign]

Do people ask that all the time?

Wait, I have to say, if Emma Thompson was in Star Wars

as, do you know when the young Jedi

has lost their will to live and they end up

in a forest somewhere and then someone appears to them

to teach them? Yes.

You would be great at that. Yes, or I could be

Jabba the Hutt handmaiden. [laughing]

Okay maybe that'd be better. I would quite like that

because he's funny, it would be fun to be with.

And you would like to wear that bikini top?

Yeah and I could squeeze those frogs for him.

[laughing]

When is? Mindy Kaling's birthday?

You see, they are narrowing it down.

June 24th. Don't tell them the truth!

Don't tell them the truth? No, because they'll look up

the records and turn up on your doorstep.

Oh my goodness.

Which Mindy Kaling character are you?

Oh, that's a good one.

I've played some real characters.

Yes. Yes.

Which are you though? Which Mindy Kaling character

am I? Yeah, really.

I'm the real life Mindy Kaling.

Oh. I'm one of my characters.

Here. Okay none of these questions

make any sense at all. Who did Mindy Kaling voice

in Inside Out?

Good question, I played the character Disgust.

Here we go. [peeling off paper]

Who did Mindy Kaling babysit?

Did I babysit anyone famous?

I don't think I babysat anyone famous.

That's a really specific question.

I think it's part of the whole, you know,

trying to find out where you live thing.

I know.

You know what, I've had a good life.

What Emma Thompson?

You know what I just have to point out?

Mm-hmm?

Is that it's extremely uncomfortable

to keep saying your own name out loud.

It just feels wrong and self important.

So I just want to say that, okay?

[laughing] [peeling off paper]

[mumbling]

Thompson look like now! I look like this.

What are they comparing that to, I wonder?

Actually, no, it's not true.

I don't look like this.

I look like this after an hour in hair and make up.

[laughing] [peeling off paper]

What did Emma Thompson study at Cambridge?

Oh that's a great question.

I studied wizardry, obviously.

[laughing]

I studied? [laughing]

I'm trying to think there for a moment.

I studied physics and international relations.

No I didn't, I studied English literature.

What languages does Emma Thompson speak?

French, Spanish and a bit of Italian.

You do? Oui, si.

We could have used that in the movie. [laughing]

Yah, but I don't speak German.

I only do the accent, quite well.

What did Emma Thompson write? [laughing]

Sense and Sensibility! Yeah, Nanny McPhee

and then several things that have not been made

but let's not go there. Oh.

Sense and Sensibility is real good.

That's very kind.

Well I didn't write it, of course, Jane Austen wrote it.

Well your adaptation. So I plagiarized it

as a screenplay, there ya go.

What is Mindy Kaling's baby's name.

Okay well this is a little interesting.

It has to do with our movie.

My child is branded content for this movie. [laughing]

I have changed to name to Lainey.

My baby's name is Katherine because it's my favorite name

which is also the name of Emma's character.

Why is it your favorite name?

It was weird because I wrote the movie

before I had the baby and then I thought,

you know she's a very complicated woman

so to name your child after the complicated character?

But it just--

Is she a very complicated baby?

A little, yes she is. Mm.

I said it was a really interesting story,

I don't know interesting that panned out.

What is Mindy Kaling like in real life?

She's really fantastically nice and funny

and witty and clever and extraordinary.

Okay, you can listen now. Okay, I hope that

was all good things and not crusty old bitch.

It was your address, actually.

[laughing]

What has Mindy Kaling written?

I've written-- Mindy.

On The Office.

I've written for my show, The Mindy Project.

I wrote two books and I wrote Late Night.

That's it. Two books?

Two books.

Actually, I've written some books, too.

You have? Yeah.

What were the books?

I was asked by Peter Rabbit

to write some new Peter Rabbit books.

Yeah, I got a letter from Peter Rabbit

with a half eaten radish in it.

Mm-hmm. It was very clever

of them actually, cause I wouldn't have done it otherwise.

I'll get them for you, for Katherine.

What is Mindy Kaling's ethnicity?

Oh. [laughing]

Why does she have that rich cocoa skin?

That's creepy! [laughing]

What's your ethnicity? We don't know--

What's your ethnicity? Where are you from?

We wanna know.

My, of course the way that this is insight into my brain,

I'm like, oh we're so interested.

But it's really, what's your ethnicity

because probably weird and look different to them.

[laughing]

But I'm like, they're obsessed with me.

Um, I'm Indian. There you go.

What did Mindy Kaling study at Dartmouth?

Classics. [gasping]

Did you? Here this is--

One of my favorite subjects at school?

Is Latin and Greek? Yeah.

Well my focus was Latin, not Greek.

Yeah, yeah, no absolutely.

Greek's really tricky. Greek's very tricky.

But Latin's absolutely one of my favorite subjects.

I should have done Classics, actually.

I didn't know you did Classics.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Anyway.

We'll talk about this later.

Does Emma Thompson,

it's a short word.

Fart? Think of all the words?

Fart.

Just so many bad things.

Sing?

[singing operatically]

You have a great singing voice, actually.

She said, dabbing the blood from her ears.

[laughing]

Does Emma Thompson drink?

Does the Pope [censored] in the woods?

I thought that was gonna say,

is Emma Thompson dysfunctional? [laughing]

Does Emma Thompson dye her hair?

No.

No, this is completely natural.

I just have this extraordinary,

sort of slightly pink, you know, blonde thing going on.

Does Emma Thompson have an Oscar?

Yes, I do, I have two.

Does Emma Thompson have children?

Yes, I have two.

Yes. Yeah, great.

I might have to keep that actually

because it sort of defines me. [laughing]

This sounds like a man deciding whether or not

he's gonna ask you out on a date.

[laughing]

Does she drink?

Does she sing? Has she given birth?

I'll have nothing to do with her.

What would you ask?

I'd say, what inspired Mindy Kaling first

to write comedy?

What inspires her now?

What does she think is funny?

I would have asked how much money does Emma Thompson make?

[laughing]

I've drunk it all away and spent all of it on my hair dye.