(key clacking)

(phones ringing)

Special Projects, Nicole.

Good morning. Did you get my fax?

[Nicole] Yes, all 42 pages.

Ah, and you thought I was a Luddite.

I have to admit, you have nice handwriting.

Good penmanship, actually.

The backbone of any strong nation state.

So, what did you think of my analyse?

Let's see.

25 Reasons North Korea's Computer Virus Will Not Work,

by Henry Topple.

That's very Buzzfeed of you, by the way.

Lists; it's the only way young people read these days,

or so I read in a chartacle.

Number 25: There is no record of Kim Jong-un

attending DeVry University,

therefore he is not a computer programmer.

Case closed, fax me my steak knives.

Actually, Deputy Chief Rowlands says

Pyongyang is using Chinese hackers to design Staxna.

What, what are talking about some kind of

candy bar I've never heard of, now?

[Nicole] Staxna, that's the name of the virus.

Staxnut.

Staxna. Staxnut.

Staxna. Staxnut.

You got it.

Sounds like a horse at the Kentucky Derby,

and a loser to boot.

Hey, what was the most you ever lost at the races?

I lost a briefcase full of launch codes once at Belmont,

but don't worry, they weren't ours. (chuckles)

But the president spent a month in the bunker.

The more we learn about Staxna, the scarier it sounds.

Oh come on, it's just a computer virus.

What's the worst it could do?

Rowlands thinks it's designed to

replace all American digital content with footage

of North Korean flag dances, celebrating the harvest.

Good lord. Even Downton Abbey?

Yes. Mr. Bates,

we should nuke 'em. The good news is,

North Korea's struggling to make enough flags,

so we still have time.

But we're scrambling to figure out when the virus will hit.

Now wait a minute,

would the virus take out electronic dance music, as well?

If it works as designed, yes.

So no more European synthesizer autotune rap songs?

I guess.

So no more dubstep. Yes.

Electroclash? Correct.

Deep house? Yup.

Trance? Yeah.

Trip hop. Yes.

Danish trap. Yeah.

Chill wave. I guess.

What about Podcasts?

[Nicole] They've be completely wiped out.

Uh-huh. Mhm. I know--

I know what you're-- Uh-huh.

But we have to-- Mhm.

We have to stop it anyway. (deep sigh) It's always so

tricky in these gray areas between right and wrong.

Gimme a clear black and white situation like Vietnam.

Yeah, I don't think anyone's ever questioned that, so.

If history has shown anything,

every move we made was right.