TV Networks Are Running Out of Original Ideas
Released on 10/17/2013
(futuristic music)
(typing)
(comic music)
(train whistle)
Once upon a time,
good boys and girls could turn on their TV sets
and see fresh, original characters and storylines.
Nowadays, it seems like any old story
that has a trace of the macabre or the supernatural to it
is being turned into a TV drama.
The formula is simple,
find a classic yarn, public domain, of course,
so you don't have to pay anyone for the rights,
then transpose it to the present day
and film it in some city that offers huge tax breaks.
Just look at this new show, Sleepy Hollow,
which takes Washington Irving's gullible cowardly beanpole,
Ichabod Crane,
and turns him into a hunky time traveling crime fighter
in present day North Carolina.
Brought to you by the same writers
who thought they could improve Star Trek
by adding temporal paradoxes.
The most nefarious fantasy drama is undoubtedly
ABC Disney's Once Upon a Time.
This series populates a modern day city
with characters and plot devices
swiped from Beauty and the Beast,
Peter Pan, Pinocchio, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty,
and now there's a whole spin-off series
set in a Louis Carroll Wonderlandverse.
What's particularly insidious about Once Upon a Time,
is that the source material
is not the gory, creepy, classic stories
collected by Hans Christian Andersen or the Brothers Grimm,
it's the pop culture versions of these stories
that we know from the films made by the House of Mouse.
The Once Upon a Timeverse isn't the land of fairy tales,
it's Disneyland.
The show makes coy references
to Tron and 101 Dalmatians, in case you missed this.
Building vast crossover universes
out of pre-existing intellectual properties
is a classic Disney move.
Oh, it would take a hero as powerful as Hercules
to bring down this many headed media hydra.
Oh, I forgot, they've got him too.
(typing)
(train whistle)
(sweeping music)
What do you think about fairy tales in popular culture?
Let me know in the comments,
and subscribe to the Wired Channel.
Starring: Chris Baker
Bad Ideas from Hollywood: Punctuation in Titles—Age of the Colon
Why is WWE on SyFy?! Cable Networks Straying from Their Original Missions
TV Networks Are Running Out of Original Ideas
What the Bleep is Bumblebee? Indecisive Autobot Keeps Switching his Vehicular Form
Deconstructing LEGO: How a Beloved Toy Sold Out to Cross-Brand Licensing
The Inauthenticity of CG Blood and the Demise of Karo Syrup and Red Food Coloring
The Implausibility of Thor's Physics-Defying Hammer, Mjölnir
The Unraveling of Secret Societies in Pop Cultural References
The Watered-Down Hunger Games Trilogy
Giving Thanks for TV Shows That End Before Their Time
Can Ben Affleck Successfully Suit Up as the Dark Knight?
Chris Baker Responds to YouTubers About Kick-Ass 2 and the Real-Life Superheroes Trend
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug and the Evolution of CG Dragons
Chris Baker’s Favorite Christmas Movie of All Time
Riddick and Hollywood's Failed Attempts at Using POV Cameras
The Big Bang Theory’s Shortcomings and Inaccurate Portrayal of Geek Culture
Will Disney Ruin Star Wars?
The Most Famous Female Comic Book Character is a Franchise Flop
The Unnecessary RoboCop Remake
Late Night with Seth Meyers and Stale After-Hours Talk Shows
How to Improve the Academy Awards
Mr. Peabody & Sherman and Today’s Remakes of Classic Cartoons
The Veronica Mars Movie Project and the Pitfalls of Crowdfunding Films
Fox News’ Abundant & Unnecessary Use of Big-Area Touch Screens
Captain America’s Unrealistic Vibranium Shield
The Problem with Game of Thrones
Hasbro, Your "Magic: The Gathering" Movie Is Murdering My Childhood
How Hollywood Can Get Evil Twins Right
Why Exactly Is Parkour Not a Film Genre Yet?
Networks Somehow Find Another Way to Resurrect Old Shows
The Greatest Fictional Characters Ever All in One Show? Sign Me Up
Why the New Godzilla Movie Won’t Suck
The Madness of the Timeline Mashup in the New X-Men
Why Disney Needs to Make More Movies About Classic Villains
Why Edge of Tomorrow is of the Greatest Movie About Video Games, Ever
Is Darth Disney Destroying Star Wars’ Expanded Universe?
Why Clint Eastwood’s “Jersey Boys” is Destined to Crash & Burn on the Big Screen
Death to the Superhero Comic-Book Movie … But Not All Comic-Book Movies
Why Andy Serkis is the Greatest Actor of His Generation
Give Me a Standalone Comic-Book Movie or Give Me Death
Reboots We Need Way More Than "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
Brett Ratner's Hercules & Pillaging Story Lines for Big-Budget CGI Films